For several weeks, you have thought about leaving your spouse. You know that it will affect many facets of your life. For example, you wonder where you can affordably live, what happens with your children and whether you can maintain the lifestyle to which you are accustomed.
So many things swirl in your head as you vacillate in this marital purgatory. Unhappiness prevails, discussions are nearly non-existent and tensions surface over some of the most mundane things. The idea for divorce hovers in the air like a dark cloud over the two of you. Before deciding on the divorce route, you have some thinking to do and decisions to make. Important questions must be asked, and only you can answer them.
Happiness, finances and children
Divorce is a big decision and a big step. Here are some critical questions to ask yourself when pondering whether to pursue a divorce:
- Can I achieve happiness on my own?: Some people branch out almost right away upon separating from a spouse. In such cases, they felt held back by a partner. The two of you no longer were in synch with life. For other people, it takes time to get accustomed to no longer being married.
- Do I have the financial wherewithal to live on my own?: This is a tough one, and you must prepare for a potential rollercoaster ride. Your lifestyle will change. Understand that you are now in control, but you must prepare budgets and make financial sacrifices.
- How will divorce affect the lives of my children?: The children likely know that something is amiss in your marriage. You must prepare them for the changes that will take place. Expect sadness, tears and arguments. They need reassurance that their two parents will remain in their lives.
- Will I be able to oversee certain living details that my spouse handled?: There are many topics to choose from. You may have to learn how to prepare your taxes, how to understand investments, keep track of your children’s activities or learn how to cook their favorite meals.
Talk to trusted friends and make a point to take care of your physical and emotional well-being. Look inside yourself and ask yourself important questions and come up with the answers. You can do it and even lead a happier life.